Random morbidness.

[chaotic_nipple]

One of the ways I combated boredom in Iraq was contemplating how I would use my inevitable maiming as an opportunity for self expression and personal adornment. "Let's see, if I lose a hand AND a hand AND an eye, I'll have the best pirate costume EVER!" That sort of thing.

I think I was starting to run short of actual good ideas, when it occurred to me that if I lost a leg far up enough to require a partial hip prosthesis, I'd be able to get it chromed, and tell people to "Bite my shiny metal ass!" While this wouldn't have really made up for losing a whole leg (and probably some genitals in the process), it would have been funny, for a while at least. And even after it had _stopped_ being funny, I could still keep saying it, because who's going to tell a one-legged eunuch that his jokes are wearing thin?

Comments

[frater-treinta.livejournal.com]

I miss grandpa. :(