chaotic_nipple

Ganked from filkertom:
1. Do you have the guts to answer these questions and re-post as The Controversial Survey?

No, you can stop reading now.

2. Would you do meth if it was legal?

Probably not.

3. Abortion: for or against it?

As I am not a female, biological or otherwise, it's none of my damn business. And unless you, personally, possess a functioning uterus, it's none of yours either.

4. Do you think the world would fail with a female president?

The world has a president?

5. Do you believe in the death penalty?

In principle, yes, but in practice, our justice system has proven itself to be too fallable to be trusted with that sort of power.

6. Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?

Yes. if only so the stoners would quit whining about it.

7. Are you for or against premarital sex?

For.

8. Do you believe in God?

Nope. Gee, this survey is easy!

9. Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?

Yes. As should polygamy. If non-human sapience is ever engineered, then AIs, posthumans, and uplifted squid should all be eligible too.

10. Do you think it's wrong that so many Hispanics are illegally moving to the USA?

I think it's "wrong" in the sense that it's illegal, and the human trafficers who profit from it are usually tied up in other criminality too, and the government does have a legitimate interest in cracking down on it. That said, I don't really condemn the illegals, as they're only doing exactly what I would do in their situation.

Edit: If we _really_ want to crack down, we should start deporting their employers. They're the real criminals, IMO.

11. A twelve year old girl has a baby, should she keep it?

Generally "no", but I'm sure there are exceptional 12 year olds out there who can handle the responsibilities.

12. Should the alcohol age be lowered to eighteen?

Yes.

13. Should the war in Iraq be called off?

Called on account of sun? It's hot as a mofo there...

14. Assisted suicide is illegal: do you agree?

Yes, I agree that it's illegal. I'm getting the feeling that the writer of this meme isn't as bright as they think they are.

15. Do you believe in spanking your children?

In some circumstances. If a child is too young to understand reason, and engaged in behavior that present an active danger to themselves or others, then a little aversive conditioning is perfectly justifiable. It should never be because the parent was simply upset, or because the child was "bad", it should be a simple matter of what stimulus is most effective to get the kid to learn.

16. Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?

Considering that that _is_ the approved method of disposing of worn out flags, then yes, I would pocket the money, and then burn the flag with all due ceremony and reverence.

17. Who do you think would make a better president? McCain or Obama?

We'd beter HOPE it's Obama now. :-)

18. Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?

Not really.

... Then anyone who babbled about how slavery* "wasn't that bad", would IMMEDIATELY be abducted and sold to a third world sweatshop, chained to a sewing machine, fed maggoty gruel, and beaten daily. Five years later, they would be asked if they still felt the same.

Edit: Slavery of the near modern, New World variety. In an ancient context where slaves really _weren't_ any worse off than free peasants, this doesn't apply.

The Bible is now officially being translated into LOLCat. Also, PZ Myers is officially Expelled.

... Is going to have the most motivated, hard-core crew EVER:
Ship built with WTC steel christened. The USS New York, an amphibious assault ship built with scrap steel from the ruins of the World Trade Center, was christened Saturday as a source of strength and inspiration for the nation.

Other news: This is both fucked-up as Hell, and perversely awesome: A supervisor at a motivational coaching business in Provo is accused of waterboarding an employee in front of his sales team to demonstrate that they should work as hard on sales as the employee had worked to breathe.

This, on the other hand, is just fucked up: Judge jailed for refusing to sit in court with crucifix. An Italian judge was sentenced to a year in prison for refusing to sit in a courtroom with a crucifix on the wall, his lawyer said. Sad that stupidity like this should take place, but at least it's not happening _here_...

While I find the whole concept of "aristocracy" deeply abhorrent, even I have to admit that Prince Harry's one of the "good ones".

Random thoughts: I wonder how long it will be before the purveyers of the "Black Confederates" meme notice that Nazi Germany's military had a small number of ethnically "Jewish" soldiers in their ranks, and therefore conclude that the Nazi's weren't really anti-semitic?

Also, peoples should read Ctrl+Alt+Del, Divalicious, and Sketchies.

update I am a bad boyfriend, as I did not credit the wonderful and awesometastic nanimo for Ctrl+Alt+Del. Forgive, Mistress! Forgive! (sob)

Priests brawl at Bethlehem birthplace of Jesus.

BETHLEHEM, West Bank (AFP) - Seven people were injured on Thursday when Greek Orthodox and Armenian priests came to blows in a dispute over how to clean the Church of the Nativity in Bethlehem.
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Following the Christmas celebrations, Greek Orthodox priests set up ladders to clean the walls and ceilings of their part of the church, which is built over the site where Jesus Christ is believed to have been born.

But the ladders encroached on space controlled by Armenian priests, according to photographers who said angry words ensued and blows quickly followed.

God bless us, every one!

John Scalzi visits the "Creation Museum" so you don't have to.

Clowns KKKick KKK ass!

Saturday May 26th the VNN Vanguard Nazi/KKK group attempted to host a hate rally to try to take advantage of the brutal murder of a white couple for media and recruitment purposes...

Unfortunately for them the 100th ARA (Anti Racist Action) clown block came and handed them their asses by making them appear like the asses they were.

“White Power!” the Nazi’s shouted, “White Flour?” the clowns yelled back running in circles throwing flour in the air and raising separate letters which spelt “White Flour”.

“White Power!” the Nazi’s angrily shouted once more, “White flowers?” the clowns cheers and threw white flowers in the air and danced about merrily.

“White Power!” the Nazi’s tried once again in a doomed and somewhat funny attempt to clarify their message, “ohhhhhh!” the clowns yelled “Tight Shower!” and held a solar shower in the air and all tried to crowd under to get clean as per the Klan’s directions.

At this point several of the Nazi’s and Klan members began clutching their hearts as if they were about to have a heart attack. Their beady eyes bulged, and the veins in their tiny narrow foreheads beat in rage. One last time they screamed “White Power!”

The clown women thought they finally understood what the Klan was trying to say. “Ohhhhh…” the women clowns said. “Now we understand…”, “WIFE POWER!” they lifted the letters up in the air, grabbed the nearest male clowns and lifted them in their arms and ran about merrily chanting “WIFE POWER! WIFE POWER! WIFE POWER!”

I dearly wish I could have been there. :-D Of course, some morons in the comment section whine that this sort of counter-protest is "censorship", and proves that it's us godless lib'ruls who are _really_ the intolerant ones. Poor babies.

... For refusing to ride in the back of the bus. Absolutely disgraceful, I expect immediate condemnation from every corner of the blogosphere for the backwards country involved. I'll start holding my breath right about... now.

As I inch further and further into decrepitude and senility, I find myself seriously considering the virtues of sterilization. It seems increasingly unlikely that I'll ever actually get married, leaving the only possibility of reproduction being a drunken tryst, and that would just be plain irresponsible. I have enough relatives that most of my genes have already been passed on, and if I ever _do_ get hitched, there's always adoption.

Anyway, here's linky things: Marvel at The School Prayer Riots, thrill to Bootleg Jack Chick Theater, be amazed that Abstinance-only doesn't work, Be electrified at the Secret Wars Re-enactment Society, goggle your eyes at Transformers Cosplay, and faint with glee while watching Transformers Movie Trailers. Man, if this movie somehow _doesn't_ rule, there'll be hell to pay, by Primus!

Edit: More linky things, this time permanent ones. Read the blogs Pam's House Blend and Pandagon, then look at the pretty pictures in Candi and Home on the Strange.

pecunium points us to this right-wing blog survey, where among other questions, 'Conservative' bloggers are asked: "Do you think that a majority of Democrats in Congress would like to see us lose in Iraq for political reasons?" to which 84% said "Yes!".

Now, this is very interesting. You go back to last November's archives for those blogs, and you will find hundreds upon hundred of reader comments (and sometimes posts from the bloggers themselves) expressing the opinion that the election results warrented another 9/11, either to "Punish Defeat-o-crat voters" or to "Wake people up". Yet if someone were to conclude that these sentiments were proof that "The Majority of Republicans would like to see more terrorist attacks on US soil for political reasons", why, they'd be declared clinically insane. Go figure...